


(Don't Tear Me Down) All I Need

by Furrina



Series: Pride of the Snake [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Established Relationship, HP: EWE, M/M, Mpreg, Remus is a Dick, Snape is Hormonal, Teddy is Awesome!, bottom!Snape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-15
Updated: 2013-02-15
Packaged: 2017-11-29 09:38:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/685498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Furrina/pseuds/Furrina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Sometimes we put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Please read the *spoilery* end notes before commenting]

Remus Lupin carried his 20 month old son through the throngs of students exiting their classrooms after the last class of the day. His footsteps followed the familiar path to the Hogwarts Dungeons... to the classroom of one surly Potions Master. He waited in the corner as the last of stragglers cleared out and the said Potions Master thumped down on his seat, his head in his hands.

"You alright?" he asked walking up to his greasy git.

"Yeah," Snape replied. "I swear these brats get stupider by the years. Just give me a minute."

Lupin laughed, a deep chesty rumble that roused the little boy, who looked around sleepily, then settled his eyes on the man behind the desk simultaneously changing the colour of his usual turquoise hair to lanky black shoulder-length, while his nose grew and curved looking absurdly like a beak on his tiny face. Remus laughed again as Severus Snape huffed a tired sigh and stood up, holding his arms out for the boy.

The boy practically jumped into his arms and burrowed his nose in the crook of the Potions Master's neck, sniffing audibly as he fidgeted to find his perfect perch. Finally, satisfied with his station, he uttered a deep contented sigh and closed his eyes and went back to sleep, leaving the adults to their problems.

"I can never understand how you're the only one who has never had any problems with him," Remus muttered half-jealously, looking at how easily Teddy and Severus had taken to each other. If Severus was around, Teddy had eyes only for him. No one could separate them and for the most part nobody even tried... thanks to the time when Minerva had misunderstood the reason behind his transformation and almost risked sending him into a hyperventilative frenzy.

Severus smirked fondly and caressed the oily hair. "That's because I'm the only who doesn't mollycoddle him," he replied softly so as to not rouse the sleeping boy. "Now. Are we taking our dinners in my quarters or yours?"

"I thought we could join the others in the Great Hall," Remus suggested. "I know Minerva doesn't care, but other Professors are starting to ask questions. I hope you..."

"It's okay, I understand." Severus nodded and smiled softly. "I'll freshen up and meet you by at the Head Table. Can you...?"

"Yeah," Remus made to take his son back, but Teddy whimpered and clung tighter to the Potion's Master, until both the adults relented.

"I'll bring him with me," Severus said, hefting the boy more securely in his arms and turned in direction of his quarters, as Remus wistfully looked behind them.

* * *

"Potion's Conference?" Remus asked, looking up at his lover as he dressed for the day. His own classes did not start until a few hours later, an advantage to be being a single parent.

"Yeah," Snape replied, shrugging on his robe and buttoning up. "This weekend. In Paris. I should be back by Monday."

Remus Lupin looked at the man standing in front of the mirror, checking his reflection. For the past few days, he had been noticing something wrong with Severus. He was sick a lot, his face had taken a sallow tinge... he had even started smelling different. It was a familiar scent, but one Remus could not easily place. "Are you sure you're well enough to travel?" he asked gently.

The other tensed, ever so slightly, that if Remus were anyone else he might have missed it. "What do you mean?" Severus asked, turning around to face his lover.

Remus sat up and shrugged. "It's just... you've been sick a lot lately. Even yesterday morning I caught up throwing up. I'm worried, Severus."

"Don't be ridiculous, Lupin," Severus snapped irritatedly, but without malice. "It's just an upset stomach. Nothing a few doses of Antacid can't fix."

Remus nodded and stood up, in all his naked glory... easily walking up to him to slip his arms around the other's waist. Severus raised his hand to his lover's cheek and smiled, then tilted his head to bare the neck for his mate... the claiming mark barely visible above the high-collar. Remus nuzzled the neck, then pulled back to press their lips together, softly at first... then harder when Severus showed no signs of pulling away.

But Severus pushed him back when Remus' hands slipped to his arse and started squeezing. "As much as I love what you're doing, Lupin," he muttered making no move to pull away. "I don't think the impressionable Witches and Wizards of the future would want their batty old Professor to walk in looking like he has been thoroughly shagged."

Remus laughed and leaned forward to peck once more on the lips, then stepped back. "You're right," he added, half-seriously. "We can't have anyone knowing that the Terror of the Dungeons is engaged in a clandestine affair with their favourite DADA Professor."

Severus smiled and nodded, but Remus was loath to realise that the smile did not quite reach his eyes. "Yeah, you're right," he said, pulling away, but keeping his voice cheerful. "We can't have anyone knowing that."

* * *

"Are you sure, Professor?" the Healer sitting in front of him looked at Severus with a sceptical eye, half expecting him to yell at her and deduct points for Insolence.

Instead, he just nodded softly. "I'm sure, Healer Madison."

"But Professor... the risks..." she still pressed. The procedure to abort a child of male pregnancy was a rare and delicate one, since the child, unlike females, was keyed to its Carrier's Magic. Risks included anything from Loss of Magic to Death.

"I'm well aware of the complications and the risks, Ms. Madison," Severus replied, irritatedly. "I've read up on the procedure. I'm perfectly sure."

"But..." the Healer still looked unsure. Unlike in the Muggle world, infanticide and foeticide were considered highly immoral, if not illegal, especially in the aftermath of Voldemort's reign, where so many newborns had been murdered because of their blood status. "What about the father?" she asked, looking for an out. If the father protested, she wouldn't have to go through with it.

"It may have escaped your notice, Ms. Madison, that  _I_  am the father," Snape snapped angrily. Being a spy for 20 years, he knew a shoddy stalling tactic if he ever saw one. He just hoped no one had seen him here and informed Minerva... or worse, Remus. The last thing he needed was to deal with a bunch of emotional Gryffindors and he blamed only half of it on his hormones. "I came here because I thought I could depend upon you. But if you're not up to the task, I can always go somewhere else. I'm sure there are other places around England where I can avail similar services for an additional Galleon."

He pushed his chair back and stood up, turning around to stalk out of the Healer's office, when he heard a quiet, resigned "Wait!" behind him. He back to find the Healer Levitating a sheaf of parchments to the desk.

"Sit down, Professor," Healer Madison said placatingly. "Fill up the forms and give them to Nurse Harrison outside. She'll give you your dressing gown and show you to the changing room. I'll go and prep the OT."

The Healer handed him the forms and a self-filling Quill and left him to his lonely misery.

-x-

The Hospital forms were charmed to automatically make copies in triplicate – one for the patient's files, one for the Healer and one copy for the Hospital. It was a standard consent form, relieving the Hospital of any blame in case of complications. Severus kept the "Father's Name" column blank. He almost wrote "R. J. Lupin" in place of "Emergency contact", but wrote  _Narcissa Malfoy, Malfoy Manor, Wilts_ instead _._

He carried the stack to the big burly Nurse, who reminded him of Hagrid, sitting outside, and watched as she perused the document with a detached eye. She found it to her satisfaction and ushered him into a plain white room with a bed, a chest of drawers and an opaque plastic curtain, all reeking of strong cloying Lavender scent, as if to overcompensate and mask the smell of the disinfectant. The scents and his situation overwhelmed him and Severus pressed a hand to his mouth to stop the bile that had lodged in his throat since he had kissed Remus and Theodore before taking their leave.

The matronly Nurse pulled a set of white-washed hospital gown from the dresser and handed it to him, then conjured a pan and set it on the floor beside the bed. "You don't have to be strong all the time," she said with an air of someone who spoke from experience. "Sometimes it's okay to let go."

She turned around and left the room without waiting for his reply. Severus looked around the sterilized, melancholy room and reached for the pan, emptying whatever contents of his stomach that remained after throwing up his breakfast in the morning.

-x-

It had been a while since the nurse had left him alone. Maybe it was only a few minutes, but it felt like hours.

Severus paced the room nervously. If he had been apprehensive before, he was tittering on the edge of a full-blown panic attack right now. Not for the first time, he questioned his decision.  _Did he really want to go through with it?_  The immediate answer was  _"No! He didn't."_

He, in spite of claiming to the contrary, loved children. He had taken great joy in caring for Draco when he was younger... of sharing his love for potions... of influencing his intellectual simulation. His Slytherins, he had always treated like his own, and the others who were not completely imbecilic got his grudging respect... none more so than Neville Longbottom who had come a long way from boy who was terrified of his own shadow and whose Boggart was Snape himself. But he had always wanted one of his own... a young babe he could hold in his arms, laughing and smiling while Remus sat beside him smiling proudly and looking at him with all the love in the world and Theodore played before them. In his younger dreams, he had never considered Theodore, but now that he was here, Severus wouldn't have it any other way.

But Remus did not want any of that. He was fine with the arrangement they had going, and as much as Severus longed for his fantasies, he had always been a realist... and the reality was that Remus would never admit to being with him and he did not want the child to suffer for it's parent's mistakes.

He shook his head and resisted the urge to press a hand to his still-flat stomach, curl up on the bed and cry.  _No!_   _As long as he had Theodore and Remus in any capacity he could get, he would be fine._

And so lost was he in his thoughts that he completely missed it when the door opened and a sandy haired man entered the room.

"Severus," Remus said, rousing Severus from his reverie.

"Remus!" he exclaimed, whirling around so fast that his head spun around. In an instant, Remus was beside him, steadying him, leading him to the bed and sitting him down on it. "What are you doing here?"

"I think the better question would be 'what are  _you_ doing here'?" Remus retorted sardonically.

"I... I... I'm..." Severus looked away, but Remus held up a hand to stop him. "Why didn't you tell me?" Severus took a deep breath. "Remus... I..." but Remus looked over the interruption. "Merlin, Severus! How could you? If Neville hadn't seen you outside and called up to ask what was wrong... you should've told me, Severus. I would've..."

"You would've what?" Severus asked resignedly, cutting him off. Remus looked up in surprise. "You would've what, Remus? Accepted the babe... asked me to marry you... publicly declared the fact that we've been together for almost 25 years without anyone knowing...? There's _nothing_  you would've done, Lupin."

Remus looked at him in surprise, and shook his head as if he couldn't believe the words. "You know that's not true, Severus. I Love you. I've always..."

"Always?" Severus scoffed. "We started dating when we were 15, Lupin. The day after I lost my virginity to  _you,_ your  _friends_ hung me upside down for all school to see and you did  _nothing_. That Prank irrevocably destroyed my friendship with Lily. And the night Black sent me to the Shrieking Shack... even  _then_  you did  _nothing_..."

"You  _know_ I did not know anything about  _that,"_  Remus protested, interrupting.

"I do... but you should've told me the truth. I started following you, because I was worried about you..."

"But I... you..." Remus' protested, but stopped when he saw the look on Severus' face. "We had been fucking for year and half by then and never  _once_  did you think to tell me that you turned into a blood-thirsty monster every month."

"Severus," Remus protested again. "You know I couldn't..." but Severus ignored him. "And when Potters died, you left England, conveniently forgetting that you weren't the only who had lost someone that night."

"Severus..." Remus spoke up, desperate to get a word in. He had no idea what was going on in Severus' mind. "Why are you bringing it all up, I thought that was all behind us?"

Severus snorted. "Of  _course_ , it was. I forgave you when you came back to teach, didn't I? You tripped across the Head Table and ended up in my bed. And then, you lied to me about Black."

"I told you I was..."

"Protecting Black. I know. And during Order meetings at his home, you lied to Black about us."

"But... but I  _couldn't_  tell anyone. It was..."

"The War. So, I've heard. And how long did it take you believe that I was a traitor and fall into bed with Nymphadora. A week... two... a month? Tell me, Lupin."

"Severus..." Remus finally realized where it might be going. "Is this about Teddy? Because I assure you..."

"IT'S NOT ABOUT  _TEDDY_ , YOU SODDING FUCKER!" Severus yelled, finally giving into the urge to punch Remus in the nose, hard. Remus reared back as the blood exploded on his face. "It's not about Theodore! Were you even listening to me, you sorry excuse of a Gryffindor. You are a coward, Lupin. A coward. And you have never stood up for me.  _Never_. You have time and again let all your other relations get between us. I understood when you remained silent with Potter and Black, but then you let Nymphadora fucking  _Tonks_..." he said the word as if it were a particular venomous poison, "... manipulate you into her bed... and then let  _Molly Weasley_ ," he spat the words, "talk you into marrying her son's reject without so much as a thought to how  _I_  would feel. How do you think I felt when I heard you had settled into a domestic bliss while I was off trying to keep the Dark Lord and the Carrows from killing and torturing  _your_  precious students? And what would you have done if Nymphadora hadn't followed you that day? You would've easily chosen your wife and your son over me."

Remus sat back, aghast, as he got yet another look into the multi-faceted man. Apparently the Volcano that had been bubbling for 25 years was finally exploding. "Severus... I'm sor—"

"You don't you  _dare_ apologize, Lupin," Severus snapped. "I have suffered because your cowardice for a long time, but I'll be damned if I let my-" he stopped himself. "An innocent babe suffer because of it."

"Severus, are you... are we... over?" Remus felt his heart sink. Severus' accusations were not wrong, but he was  _trying_... wasn't he? _He was..._

"Still as selfish as ever, eh Lupin?" Severus uttered a short self-deprecating laugh that sent chills down Remus' spine. "No," he stated resolutely. "I wish I could leave you. I wish I could put you behind me and never look back. But I can't... I'm too old, too set in my ways. You are like the addiction I can never get over. Every time I try, there you are with your pleading eyes and your open smile and I can't help but take you back. But..." he finally gave in the urge to wrap his arms protectively around his stomach. "I'm not going to let you treat this child like that. It will have enough problems already, being born to a man who was at one time the Public Enemy No. 2, after Voldemort, I'm not going to add "bastard" to its list of names. I'm sorry, Remus."

"You can't..." Remus said, shaking his head. His nose had healed – thank Merlin for the Werewolf metabolism – but it still hurt. "Severus... you can't go through with it," he argued.  _He_ couldn't _let Severus go through with the abortion._ "Please Severus... Just please. Don't do this. I'll do anything you want. Anything... just... just tell me."

Severus smiled wistfully. "When will you understand that I don't want anything from you, Remus..." he reached his hand and caressed his lover's cheek "...I just need you to be happy."

"But I  _am_  happy," Remus exclaimed. " _You_  make me happy. I swear. You are all I've ever wanted. I love you. You mean so much to me... to Teddy... You  _know_  how much I  _need_  you..."

Severus smiled hollowly. "And I will always be here for you," he replied. "I'll be back on Monday as promised and we will have a dinner together... you, me and Theodore... We'll put this behind us like it never happened."

"Severus..." Remus protested again, but Severus shook his head dejectedly. "It's done. The Healer is prepping the OT as we speak." He took a deep breath. "Go home, Remus. Go back to your son... and I will be there on Monday."

With that he turned around, lest Remus saw his tears. "Go, Remus," repeated quietly when he didn't hear the footsteps recede. "Just... Please. I'll be fine."

He waited with bated breath until he finally heard the footsteps leave the room and gently close the door behind them. He took a deep breath before chancing a glance at it and found that Remus had indeed left... and finally gave in to the urge to let his emotions wallow.

-x-

He didn't know how long he stayed like that... crouching on the floor, holding the bed for dear life. A part of him wished to run out and beg Remus to forgive him. Remus loved children and he would love this baby too and he would never leave because of it. But Severus was not Nymphadora. He would not hold something so dear to Remus over his head and force him into something he didn't want. If Remus wanted him, he would come back.

The other part of him wished Remus would come back... would finally stand up for him... would publicly acknowledge of their relationship. But he knew it would never happen. Remus would never stand against Potter and Andromeda and Molly Weasley and all of his friends who never accepted Severus and Severus had too much pride to beg him otherwise.  _No_ , he told himself, _it was better this way._  He had Theodore...at least until Theodore was old enough to understand who his fath— who  _Severus_  was.  _No, this was the right decision._

-x-

Severus was barely wiping away his tears when the door banged open and Remus burst in with a sharp "No!" He looked up, blinking away his tears.

Remus looked wild... his blue eyes tinged amber... a resolute set to his jaw. The last time he had seen Remus like this was the day Potters were killed and everyone thought Black had betrayed them. It was the wild look of a man who has nothing left to lose. Severus whimpered involuntarily and shrunk back, instinctively clutching his stomach. Remus fell to his knees before him. "I told the Nurse, we need a few more minutes," he huffed, breathing heavily through his mouth to calm himself. "I'm not leaving," he stated.

Severus shook his head. "Remus, I..." but Remus held up his hand. "You're not fine, Severus," he said sharply taking the blotchy face before him. "You were hyperventilating when Teddy ran high fever last month. You really think I'll believe that you are fine killing your own child. I _know_ you've wanted kids... I remember when Malfoy asked to be Draco's Godfather, you were over the moon... and then when Lily made her announcement, you were ecstatic, even though you knew James would never allow you near the child. And you love Teddy like your own. You are right, I HAVE treated you like a dirt-rag and Merlin knows why you keep taking me back... And I'm not... I won't..." Remus took a deep breath steadying his thoughts. "If you want to go through with it, I won't say anything I'll just stay with you. Andromeda can look after Teddy until Monday, but don't ask me to leave..."

"Remus, I..."

"No, please, Severus, just hear out me, okay?" Severus nodded unsurely, but complied. "I will stand by you no matter what decision you make today, but I  _beg_  you to reconsider. We can make it work... I will try my damnest to give you everything you deserve, everything that you've missed out on because I was too scared... We can be a real family. You, me, Teddy and the baby. I don't care what anyone says..."

"But you do, Remus," Severus spoke softly. "You've always cared what everyone thinks of you. That makes you, you... and I would never ask you to change. I'm just one person... a greasy, anti-social person who spends more time in his lab than healthy. I'm not worth losing your other friends over..."

"But you are!" Remus interjected. "You are worth that, and lot more. I was the fool who never understood your worth. Hell, my son has more bullocks than me, when he chose you over Minerva the other day."

"But you are not Theodore," Severus replied, tearing streaking his eyes.  _He really hated his hormones._  "And I could never ask you to make that decision. I'm not... I won't hold your child over you to alienate the people you care about..."

"That's what makes you special, you dork," Remus exclaimed. "You are not like them. You could never fight for us, because you thought you didn't deserve it... and I thought you didn't want it. Merlin! How  _could_  I have been so blind! But I'm not anymore. Severus, I want you. I want you and the baby...  _our_ baby. And I don't care how long it takes me to prove it to you... but I'm never leaving again. Ever."

"Remus," Severus protested softly. The day was taking a toll on him... he felt wrung out. "I... I don't think I can trust you anymore." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, waiting for the inevitable rejection. The sound of footsteps to indicate that Remus was gone and was never coming back. He opened his eyes to see Remus still sitting before him, smiling sadly.

"I know, love," he said sadly. "Merlin knows I've never given you a reason to trust me. But let me make amends... Give me a chance to earn back your trust. You have always given... are giving," he corrected himself, "me everything I've ever wanted without asking  _anything_  in return. It's my turn to indulge you... and I will, if you only give me this chance."

"But what if..."

"It won't," Remus stated resolutely. "I will make sure of it. Merlin help me, I will make sure of it with my every remaining breath. Please Sevy..." Severus looked up at the long forgotten pet name and Remus took it as a sign to shuffle even closer. "Please Sevy, I beg you. Just one chance... please..."

Severus sniffed and nodded softly. "Remy..." Remus' heart constricted at the name, but he felt hopeful. Even in school, Severus had refused to use it, because it sounded too...  _plebeian_. "I..."

"Hush, love," Remus' replied, leaning forward to press their lips softly together. "I promise... on my oath as a Wizard, and the Child of the Moon, I will never give you a reason to doubt again."

Severus startled at the blatant declaration, and raised his hand to his beloved's face. "Remus..." he said quietly, when the cough sounded behind them.

"Mr. Snape..." Healer Madison looked a little relieved at the turn of events, but she still had a job to do. "The OT has been ready for some time. If you are still willing, we really need to start you on the Anaesthetics. It's a time-based procedure and can't be performed after sundown."

Remus who had turned around to look at the intruder, turned back to look at his love. "Severus?" he asked unsurely. This answer would determine the course of the rest of their lives... and he couldn't help but be a little apprehensive.

Severus gulped dryly and looked between the Healer and the man he loved... the man who had hurt him time and time again. He was afraid of being hurt again, and this time he couldn't have only himself to think about... but he was nothing if not a glutton for punishment and he had _never_  been able to resist Remus.  _Especially_  when Remus looked at him with such hope and devotion. It would be a gamble, he knew. But then Love  _was_  a gamble... and a smart person would bet on it every time.

He looked at the Healer and pointedly shook his head. "No," he said softly. "I've changed my mind. I want to keep it."

The Healer let out the breath she had been holding and practically ran out of the room without waiting for another conformation. Severus had been one of her favourite Teachers back in school, barely 23 when he first started, and she had been his first protégé. He was the first to recognise her talents and to comment that she would make a great Healer one day. She had taken his words to heart, and when he had come to her for help, she had wondered how fates could be so unkind to someone who had seen nothing but the best in everyone. But now it seemed everything would work out well for her Mentor… even if it was with a Werewolf.

But Severus did not care about any of that. The moment he gave his answer, Remus grabbed his face in his hands and kissed him with so much desperate passion that he forgot to breathe. Then, he wandlessly closed the door behind the Healer, locked it and proceeded to start fulfilling the promise he had made.

* * *

Severus hefted the sleeping birthday boy up in his arms and leaned into the solid presence beside him. At five months, it was draining to walk around with a heavy two-year old but Teddy wouldn't have it any other way. It seemed that he had inherited the Black trait of Stubbornness. Not that Severus minded…  _Theodore was the best thing that had happened to him._

He still remembered the day they had returned from the Hospital. Andromeda had thrown a hissy fit, ranting about how Remus was insulting Nymphadora's memories by shacking up with an ex-Death Eater before her grave had even dried and "just think of how it will affect your son."

Severus had been fully prepared to make a tactical retreat, already lamenting his decision, but Remus stood tall and said in a no certain voice, that while he loved Dora, he could never love the way she wanted. He didn't regret Teddy, but Severus had been more of a parent to him than Dora and he wouldn't let anyone create a schism between them. If Andromeda couldn't accept Severus as a part of Teddy and Remus' life, she was welcome to give up her visiting privileges… and Teddy had helped the matters by transforming himself into as close likeness of Severus as he could and practically leaping onto him with fervent " _Fa_ -the'!"… And Andromeda had grudgingly conceded defeat.

Next day Remus sat in the Headmistress' Office, head bowed, ears flaming as Minerva took him to task, tearing into him with the viciousness of lioness protecting her cub, aided by the portraits of her Predecessors, for getting Severus up the duff without the benefit of Marriage or even a proper Courtship. The matters had only worsened when Poppy joined them. Severus had momentarily wondered that if Poppy was at the helm of the Light side, instead of Dumbledore, The War would have been won just by arranging one tête-à-tête between Poppy and Tom. But finally, he couldn't bear to see Remus looking so downtrodden – though a part of him claimed he deserved it – that he interceded on his love's behalf and distracted them with the time and tested "Look, We're having Twins!" After that he had to contend with their cooing and blathering about baby showers and adorable little tykes running around Hogwarts but it had been worth the look of pride and gratitude on Remus' face.

And now the same face was smiling at him, as he was led into a restaurant of Disneyland, Paris towards the familiar faces.  _Ah, the real reason for the outing was not Theodore,_ Severus thought silently,  _but the other "children" who had been forced to mature at an early age._ Severus nodded at the assembled group. "Potter, Granger, Weasley… George."

"Professor," George smiled, subconsciously reaching for his ear-that-wasn't-there. Severus pointedly looked away.

"Severus," Harry smiled tightly but offered his hand, half-hoping for a rejection. Seemed like Remus had  _spoken_  to his Godson-by-proxy beforehand. Severus accepted the handshake.  _It was time to lay old ghosts to sleep._

"Isn't Ms. Ginevra joining us?" Severus asked looking around for Potter's paramour.

"Actually…" Harry blushed shyly "We broke up. I'm with George now." At Severus' surprised look, he elaborated "After Remus told us about you and the babies, I figured it was time I too stopped hiding and doing what was expected of me… and found my own happiness."

Remus smiled proudly. "You should've seen him, Severus. One minute he's almost ready to propose to Ginny, next minute he's climbing into George's lap snogging the hell out of him," he added cheekily as George sniggered and pecked Harry on the cheek.

"Ah, the propensity of Gryffindors to act out at most inappropriate moments never cease," a voice drawled behind them.

Severus turned around to see his godson approaching the table, followed by a clearly besotted Longbottom. "Severus," he smiled reaching out to awkwardly hug his godfather, eyes darting automatically to his Concealed stomach. Then he turned to Remus and offered his hand. "I believe congratulations are in order." He looked at Severus out of the corner of his eye. "You are getting married I presume?"

"Draco," Severus warned, but Remus laughed and waved it away. "Soon, I hope," he replied casting a surreptitious ways glance at his unsuspecting love.

Severus blushed and took his seat, waving away Harry's offer to take Theodore for awhile. "I'm pregnant, Potter" he hissed, lowering his voice to prevent the accidental overhearing by surrounding Muggles. "Not incapacitated." Harry nodded placatingly and took his seat beside his boyfriend.

-x-

Finally, when everyone was settled, Remus went down on one knee before Severus, simultaneously retrieving a black velvet box from his pocket. Severus gaped as he opened the box to reveal a ring – white gold band set with a single Green Garnet that reflected Reddish in Sunlight. Severus marveled at the thought that had gone into the simple piece. Silver and Green – the Slytherin colours for him, the Red and Gold for Remus' Gryffindor and the morphing property of stone clearly signified Theodore's metamorphosis, while the Silver tinted Gold symbolized the babies.

But the next words took his breath away. "Severus Snape," Remus said, vaguely aware that almost every eye in the restaurant had turned towards them. "I know I have made a lot of horrible mistakes and hurt you more times than I'm comfortable thinking about, but I'd like to spend the rest of my life making it up to you… if you'll have me," he added quietly.

Severus looked from ring to Remus and barely awake boy on his lap, and back. He wanted nothing more than to fling his arms around Remus' neck and yell, "Hell, YES!" but it was too soon and the hurt was much. He looked at Remus silently willing him to understand that he was not rejecting him, but he needed more time.

Evidently Remus sensed his hesitation, because he smiled and stood up – much to the dismay of their companions and the other patrons, who no doubt were expecting some kind of a cinematic declaration, and pecked him lightly on the cheek, then handed him the box. "Keep it," he said quietly, taking the empty seat beside his betrothed. "Wear it when you decide the time is right."

Severus nodded absently and took hold of the hand offered under the table, their son asleep in his lap, as the conversation turned towards the upcoming Granger-Weasley nuptials.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't gonna do this, esp. in a fic this old, but yet another pro-lifer just praised my work and while I'm all for getting praise for my writing, having bigots complementing you should usually be taken with a grain of salt. So, here goes... First, I'm not "pro-life". I think a woman should be able to do whatever she wants with her own body, and irrespective of your beliefs, please don't force your opinions on others.
> 
> Secondly, re this fic, I read and over-read it again to check it does come as bigoted as some shit "pro-lifers" usually say. And while I agree that the abortion-clinic doctor seems like a 'pro-lifer', her opinions have literally nothing to do with Severus' decisions to keep a baby.
> 
> Finally, Severus here is not a pro-lifer, he genuinely wants those kids for their own sake. The only reason he is even contemplating the abortion is only because he doesn't Lupin to "do the right thing for the sake of doing the right thing". To be fair, when I started writing, I did want Severus to go through with the operation, with Lupin by his side (coz that's his right) but a part of me wondered if they would ever be come back from it. Because the abortion would cement in Snape's mind that Lupin was never going to publicly acknowledge their relationship (by standing aside as Severus destroyed the only physical evidence of their relationship), while for Lupin, the guilt of letting Severus down (especially knowing that Severus was doing this only to protect Lupin's secret) would be too much to handle.
> 
> There you go, if you are "pro-lifer" that's your problem, but like all other bigots please don't start your compliment of my work by waving your bigotry in my face. Look at this way, if you were a sexist, racist, homophobic dicknozzle you wouldn't advertise it so openly, would you. Rant over. Thanks for reading, your comments and criticisms are welcome :D [even if it is to tell me I'm going to hell for wanting to "murder" lumps of cells].


	2. Epilogue

** Epilogue **

Severus absently carded his fingers through his hair, one eye on his family who were making a fool of themselves in the Atlantic Ocean, the other on the double baby carriage holding the twins.

As their belated wedding present – they could only leave after the school ended for the year - the Malfoys had offered them a week-long stay at their beachside Chateau in Arcachon, all other expenses paid by Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes courtesy of George and Harry.

The strain of caring for a pair of very active newborns while taking care of a hyperactive three year old – thank Merlin, Minerva had given him the year off teaching – had been enough to drive him up the wall and he had grabbed at the opportunity like a drowning man to a floating straw.

But the honeymoon had turned into a family vacation when Teddy had thrown a tantrum, attaching himself to his father's leg and practically begging them to not leave him behind and Severus had turned to Remus looking for the world like a kicked crumpet, that Remus had no choice but to comply. So, they bundled up their entire troupe and landed here – Remus already preparing mental apologies for the havoc that a three-year old tornado would no doubt leave in his wake.

But so far it had been an easy going, barring only a few minor skirmishes… nothing that Severus couldn't, with threats of banning sweets, control. Like this morning when Teddy had apparently decided that as an older brother, he was perfectly within his limits to get his jollies from transforming his hair flaming red and his nose into a more pronounced version of their father's "beak" and  _entertaining_  his sibllings with loud animalistic noises. The twins had been inconsolable and Remus had had his hands full with two wailing infants and a very sleep deprived Severus. Finally, Teddy had taken a pity on him and tackled the more difficult task of placating the irate parent, and Severus had calmed down enough to suggest an outing to the beach.

Severus turned his attention to the carrier, leaning down to uncover the tiny faces. The fraternal twins Luke and Leia (Remus' suggestions, though Severus claimed he had been unfairly outvoted) gurgled and fussed sleepily, then almost simultaneously turned towards each other and immediately quieted down.

Both Molly and George had warned them that the twins would be inseparable, at least for the first few years, and Severus had started praying that twins took after Remus' mum in temperament. Because if Remus' mischievous "Marauder" streak was combined with Severus' temper and tendency to hold grudges, the results would be very disastrous… especially for those who would have to deal with it. Remus had laughed when Severus had initially expressed his concerns, but even he had started praying for the same.

"Hey!" Remus greeted quietly, placing the squirming brat beside his father's chair. The boy immediately clambered onto the beach lounge, latching on to the reclining man with a contented sigh. "How's my beautiful man?" he asked, leaning down to press his lips against his husband's temple.

"Fine," Severus smiled tiredly, silently casting  _Drying_  and  _Scourgifying_  Charms over Teddy, while ogling the way Remus' swimming trunks clung tightly to his legs and the rather well-endowed organ like second skin. He blushed, thinking about the spectacular way Remus had woken him up, before the twins had started wailing from Draco's old nursery, tilting his head to offer up his cheek.

Remus grinned and pressed his lips to the cheek, then flopped on the mat beside the lounge, leaning in to press soft kisses to the tiny heads. He looked up to find Severus looking at him with a strange expression. "Sevy?" he asked worriedly, a little wary to presume Severus' needs because he still wasn't comfortable asking for help, and Remus did not want to chance hurting him again.

Severus smiled and raised his hand to his husband's cheek. "I'm fine, Remy," he replied, using the term of endearment he used only it was just the two of them and he was feeling extremely contented. "Really."

Remus relaxed and leaned into the touch, turning his head slightly to press a kiss into his palm, and Severus smiled shyly knowing that as long as he had his Remus and their kids, he would always be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> Say Anything.


End file.
